Hit on by a co-worker

Dear Brian,
Hi... You answered how you can tell a guy is interested in you, but how can you tell that a woman is interested in you? (I'm a lesbian) Is it the same signals? My situation is involving an older women at work who I think is hitting on me... constantly touching me, always wanting to talk with me, walking me somewhere with her hand on the small of my back, makes comments about how I look, endearing names, has held my hand while looking into my eyes and has kissed the side of my neck... Am I reading her wrong? Or are my assumptions right?
­- spike99


Dear spike99,
You are reading her signals perfectly clear. This woman is hitting on you! The touching, the talking, the walking, the comments, etc are all obvious signs.

One could find ways to dismiss their meaning, but one does not kiss a co-worker on the side of the neck unless there’s a sexual interest. In fact, it’s not a move one makes on a co-worker at all unless one wants to be the subject of a sexual harassment complaint. Of course, it’s not harassment if you welcome it. Do you?

If so, start to respond to her comments, gestures, et al, with comments and gestures of your own. If you don't welcome her interest, simply move away when she attempts to kiss you, use your hand to remove her hand when she touches you, and perhaps tell her bluntly that her actions make you uncomfortable.

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