Is it friendship or love?

Dear Brian,
Love the advice in your column. Anyway, here is my problem. I find myself going crazy over a girl I used to work with. We were and perhaps still are best friends. She had already said I love you to me in the presence of other workers and blew a kiss to which I did not respond. While working together she used to kiss me every morning when she came to work and once said that the boss may think we are lovers. I wish I knew exactly what she was up to by her actions and if it means that she was attracted to me as more than just another girlfriend. Could it mean that she is into women? Her statements make me wonder -she would often comment that I want to kiss her and she would reach for my hand when we walk the street together and on one occasion she pushed me against the wall at the office and rubbed her leg between mine. Please help. If it’s because she has feelings for me that go beyond friendship, how do I get the thing we had back on track as we no longer work in the same department.
- Going Crazy


Dear Going Crazy,
Blowing kisses, holding hands, even saying "I love you," could be interpreted as merely platonic ways for one woman to express friendship for another, but I think it’s pretty rare. Her actions smack of something more, namely sexual attraction. In your case, there’s not a doubt in my mind that that’s exactly what it is. Pushing you against the wall and rubbing her leg between yours?

Hello!!!

This girl definitely wants you between the sheets, honey. She’s been flirting with you, and rather boldly at that. Now, how do you get the thing you had with her back on track? You may not work in the same department, but I sense that you still work for the same employer. Do you see her at all? If you pass each other in the hallway or the lunch room, don’t let her pass you by without something more than a hello. Initiate conversation and let her know you miss your previous relationship. If you don’t run into each other at all, you’ll simply have to make the effort to cross paths with her. Find a reason to visit her department, or, if your workplace has email, send her one. Say "I really miss the good times we had together," or "Long time, no see," then arrange a get together after work. Invite her to a movie or dinner. And the next time she pushes you against the wall and rubs her leg between yours, rub back, embrace her, and kiss her on the mouth. And if she doesn’t push you against the wall, well, she did it to you, so you can do it to her. Go for it!

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