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Are we just friends... or is there more?
Dear Brian, I am a 19 year-old female, and I love being around my best friend. From the day that we started hanging out we have been inseparable. We are together everyday and when we're not, we count the minutes until we get to see each other. My situation is this: people always claim that we are in love with each other, and we always have to defend our friendship, saying that we are just friends because she currently has a boyfriend. We do everything together...we eat, talk, walk, breathe, laugh, and even sleep in the same bed. She always holds my hand, kisses me on the neck, or is touching and holding me in some way. So, are we just friends? Or is there more to me and her? Am I in love? Is she? - Friends or Lovers
Dear Friends or Lovers, It's not unusual for young females to establish tight, affectionate bonds with each other. It doesn't make them lesbians, but I must say the two of you seem a little closer than most heterosexual "girlfriends." The constant hand-holding, the kissing and touching, could be platonic, but it could indicate a desire for an even more intimate relationship. Oh, and the sleeping in the same bed together. If the two of you have beds of your own but still choose to share the same mattress whenever possible, you really can't blame people for claiming the two of you are in love. And you don't seem to protest the way she showers you with affection, so my guess is you enjoy it. It's possible you may be in love with each other. Certainly if you do everything together, neither of you should shy away from openly discussing your true feelings. If you both agree that it is love, go for it. Take the relationship to the next step and become lovers if that's what the two of you want. You don't have to "defend" your relationship to anyone. Follow your heart.

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