Mad Rush to Marriage

In a short-lived musical called "Greenwillow" that opened on Broadway in 1960, star Anthony Perkins had his big showstopping moment singing "I Never Will Marry." Those privy to Hollywood gossip took the message of that song for granted. The star of "Psycho" had been romantically linked to fellow teen idol Tab Hunter and assorted other men, but never to a starlet. A decade later, in an attempt to quiet the whispers, as well as to "straighten" himself out, Perkins did what many gay men have done and married a woman, a photographer and sometime actress named Berry Berenson with whom he had several children.

It was in a 1983 cover story in People magazine that most people learned of Perkins’ homosexual past. But the star didn’t exactly come out of the closet. He claimed his gay experiences had left him unfulfilled and, now that he was married with children, had sworn off men, a claim dismissed when Perkins died of AIDS related complications in 1992. According to "Split Image," a posthumous biography of the screen’s most famous mamma’s boy, author Charles Winecoff insists Perkins’ homosexual activities did not cease but was driven further underground.

I thought of Perkins during the recent epidemic of gay marriages that have been in the news so much lately. If Perkins had been allowed to marry a man would he have done so? Would the respect that would hopefully come with official recognition of same-sex love have eliminated his fear of public exposure and even have saved his life? Would other gay men who feel pressured to marry against their desires come out and come clean about who they really are if they are free to marry a man?

Henry David Thoreau who sang the praises of civil disobedience when he wasn’t hiding in the woods, might have been delighted by the marriages taking place, especially since the rebellion is being encouraged by many city officials. San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom made no attempt to stop the marriages in his city, although maintenance workers might have wished he had if only to spare them the task of sweeping up so much rice.

Appropriately, the current wave of gay marriages started in the city famous for its homosexual population. But it didn’t end there. Despite President Bush’s proposal to amend the Constitution to prohibit marriage among couples consisting of anything but one man and one woman, each day seems to bring news of same-sex marriages in yet another state.

Where will it all lead?

Gay marriage will no doubt be a hot issue in the 2004 presidential campaign, but it is probably too hot for all but the most proudly liberal candidate to support wholeheartedly. Democratic presidential nominee John Kerry supports civil unions but draws the line when it comes to gay couples tying the knot. Hell, even Bush has indicated a wiliness to permit civil unions, so what’s the difference?

There may be no significant difference between Kerry and Bush on this issue, but our mad rush to the altar forces the issue into the headlines and on the front burner. It may bring our opponents to a boil, but just like water, their rage will likely evaporate in time and we’ll say "I do" without hearing "You won’t."

 Back to Alt. Lifestyles

View Readers' Responses
Find out what others thought about this article