Is fate handing me an opportunity?

Dear Brenda,

I have kind of a weird situation and I wanted to get some other peoples' take on this. I'm 23 and haven't dated anyone in over two years...after the breakup with my boyfriend of three years, I've been keeping busy and just haven't had the desire to date anyone, until recently.

About two months ago I met a great guy at a weekly social event...we had a nice conversation and seemed to really "click", but no phone numbers or anything were exchanged. The next couple of weeks I had hoped I would see him again at these events but he didn't come, so I decided to "forget" about him. At the very next event he showed up again, and again we seemed to hit it off (we ended up forgetting our respective groups of friends and spent most of the evening chatting and dancing together), but again no contact info was exchanged. So for the next couple of events I again had hoped that I might see him again, but as before he didn't come (he apparently only comes if his group of friends comes, which is on an irregular basis), so again I've reached the point where I've decided to "forget" about any potential with him.

My dilemma is that there is a different event this week (held the same time as the usual event) that I've made plans with my friends to try since our usual event was cancelled for this week...but yesterday we found out the usual event was back on. So now I'm not sure if I should keep with my plans or go to the usual event "just in case" the guy comes this week...I'm torn between the plans with my friends and the potential I might have with this guy (if I see him again, I will be sure to get a phone number!). I'm not really looking for anyone right now but I feel like something is pushing me towards this dating opportunity (that I'd hate to miss!), like every time I give up hope on seeing this guy again, I'm given a new opportunity to see him again.

So what should I do, go to my regular event or the new event? I'm really confused right now because I don't know if these "opportunities" are "fate's" way of telling me I'm ready to move on after my breakup, or if I'm just naive to "today's" dating styles and hoping something will happen after being alone for so long? I'm also concerned that if I don't go to the usual event, he'll think I don't go there anymore and quit coming altogether (I've found out he's asked some of the other attendees about me, so I know he's interested... too bad the attendees didn't know his number!).

I hope I've made sense...or maybe I'm just being silly with my naivete and asking a dumb question. In any case, I'd appreciate some feedback...to go (to the usual event) or not to go, that is the question. Thanks so much!
- SunshineBelle

Dear SunshineBelle,

Go to the event with your friends, like you planned. Give this guy a chance to miss you. You know you're going to see him again. Let him realize how un-fun the event is because you mysteriously weren't there that night. Trust me, if he's as interested as he probably is, he won't think that he'll never see you again, but probably be more motivated to actually ask you out.

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