How Can I Tell if He's the One?

Dear Brenda,

I'm 28, and have been dating a wonderful guy for the past 6 months... He meets every qualification I've ever wanted to find in a guy. The only problem is, I don't love him... he hasn't told me that he loves me, but if he does any time soon, I won't be able to say it back. It's not something I can explain. This is so frustrating to me, because he is so perfect. I have just always known that the person I end up with needs to be my best friend... and he isn't. I am still interested in meeting somebody I have more of a connection with. Of course, it's only been 6 months.

I am very attracted to him. He does "turn me on"... So this is a big reason why I don't want to stop dating him. I keep thinking that nobody becomes your best friend immediately - that happens over time. It's just that when I have a problem or a funny story, he's not the first person I call to tell. Maybe you could say the communication just isn't there... we talk, but not at a very deep level - just mostly stuff like, "how was your day"... and it's frustrating because I can't seem to get past that type of conversation. You know how some people you just click with, and can talk for hours? We don't have that. But I am attracted to him, and he's a great guy. So confusing!

Am I jumping the gun in thinking maybe I should end this?
- Karlym

Dear Karlym,

Tip: Explore your common interests together. Nothing will bond you like this will. If you have no common interests, well, no wonder you're feeling the way you are. The more common interests you share, the less personal sacrifice you have to make to be in the relationship.

My bf and I do have the chemistry, but we are also very much alike, and share a lot of common interests, so we always enjoy each others company. We both love exploring anything paranormal, so last weekend we went to a cold-reading lecture at a local college, and met with people from the Skeptic's Society. It was so much fun!

Ask yourself this: What are you both really passionate about?

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