Escalating a Friendship to Love

Dear Brenda,

A while ago (maybe 6 months), I asked a girl out without realizing that it was very premature. Since then (and after a short period of "avoid him, too awkward") we have become really good friends but I still want to have a relationship with her. The problem is that I think that I have sort of grown on her now because we are always having fun together (as friends) as well as she comes to me with her problems and we discuss them. How do I know if there is still a chance for a relationship and would I go about getting together in some other way?
- Edward

Dear Edward,

Well, this might be coming way out of left field, but why don't you just ask her out on a real date? Say something like, "You know what, Jennifer? We get along so well, and I really value our friendship, so I ..uh...was wondering if you'd like step it up a level and go out? I know we'd have a great time." Just like that.

Who says there's some rule that you're only allowed to ask out complete strangers instead of someone whom you already *know* you like and would have fun with? The thing you don't know is if this girl is attracted to you physically, because bottom line… that’s the deal breaker - and that, my friend, is what keeps the less adept guys on the ‘friend’ shelf for life. So how do you find out? Ask. And the sooner the better. It seems to me that if you're friends, you will always be friends, and if not, well, you move on and live your life.

So muster up the courage and ask for what you want. The worse thing that could happen is that she kindly refuses and would rather savor the friendship you already have. That's okay. Accept it and find a girl who *would* get excited about dating you... And you know she's out there...

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