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A Ring for Valentine's Day?
Dear Brian, Hello Brian! I've been dating a guy for about two months now. I like him very much and am in love with him. We met online. A month after our first date, he said that we should give each other a ring. I'm thinking about giving him a ring on Valentine's Day. But my problem is that I don't know if it's too early or not. We live an hour drive away from each other, it's not a problem because he lives near my college and I go there everyday. Recently we have not been able to see each other much. We meet once or twice a week and talk a few times on the phone. But my problem is that when we talk on the phone he is not much interested in talking and I feel like that he is not interested in me anymore but when I see him he is more passionate than before. I have asked him if he is having second thoughts about our relationship and he said no and that he loves me very much, but since he just moved here about three months ago he has a lot on his mind about his job and other stuff. So tell me what should I do?
This is my final semester and I'm very busy with college and with my full-time job. Tell me if I should give him a ring and how can I keep our relationship when we are so busy and don't get to go out much. Also, it might help you to know that we both are from different cultures, he is European and I'm middle-eastern, and he is the first guy I'm dating and have no previous relationship experience, while he has been in three relationships before me. I would appreciate your quick response. I planned on writing you a detailed e-mail but I'm bombarded with tests so I have to summarize it. Thank you very much for your time. - Kamal
Dear Kamal, His lack of interest in talking on the phone may only mean that he needs face-to-face contact to feel fully engaged in conversation. Some people are like that, and since your boyfriend is “more passionate than before” when you get together, I wouldn't worry too much about it.
But I would worry about committing too deeply after only two months, especially at a time when your mind is focused so much on your studies, and his thoughts are preoccupied with his job and “other stuff.” I would advise both of you to wait until your relationship has had time to develop before exchanging rings. Two months is not a long enough time to determine whether the two of you really have much of a future together, and it could be that you neither of you have looked at your relationship objectively at a time when you are both concentrating on other matters.
The relationship could seem more important than it is because it represents a welcome escape from the pressures of school and work. If he truly loves you, and you truly love him, there is no need to rush into anything. I advise you to wait before making such an important move.

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