Journey into the unknown?

Dear Brian,
I've just relocated from New Orleans to my hometown of Joliet. I didn't have to worry about the HIV/AIDS status of the people I knew in New Orleans because I knew them well and was comfortable with them. Which brings me to Joliet:  Although I'd like to develop a relationship with someone, I'm afraid some people here would lie to me about their HIV/AIDS status just to get me in the sack.  Please advise how I can calm myself and stop being such a worrywart about meeting someone in a "re-new" town.
- Kelly415

Dear Kelly415,
I could tell you to just calm yourself and stop being such a worrywart, but I suppose you would like something more than a rehash of your own suggestions. I might ask you how you knew the HIV status of the people you liked in New Orleans? Did you ask them to provide the results of a medical examination? Did they voluntarily give up medical documents proving beyond a doubt that they were clean? Since you're interested in developing a relationship and not simply an adventure between the sheets, let those who interest you and in whom you are interested know that you're not easy. There may not be any sex on the first date, and perhaps not even the second or third until you've both established trust. The best way to know your partner's HIV/AIDS status is to get tested together. It's hardly a complicated matter, and many gay community centers offer regular testing free of charge. Why not turn getting tested together into a date? It can be pretty exciting since you know that once you get the results, sex is going to result. The wait could be worth it. You'll both know you're free of HIV/AIDS, and when sex finally happens, the anticipation can make it all the more exciting!

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